Monday, May 26, 2014

On Turning 45


I turned 45.

Is that mid-life?

Or is 50 mid-life?

Regardless, the way I see it, I have like 50+ more years to live, so I need to make the most of it.

I'm more focused on living life to it's fullest than I have ever been at any other time in my life. Getting older makes you realize how valuable and truly short life is. The World seems to spin faster as each year passes.

There has been much reflection in my life as of late, is that a mid-life crisis setting in? Nope -- I see no crisis, and I refuse to "see everything and yet decide nothing". I see no inaction in my future, I see much vitality.

So I shall reflect.
We should all reflect from time to time,
Yes, that's what I shall do!

I have never been so comfortable in my own skin, as I am now that I'm in my 40's.
I actually LIKE me!

Seeing 45 pass me by and being ever so slightly in my rear view mirror, I am reminded that there is a fine line between living the life I truly want to live and being seen as self centered. I don't want to be seen as a self centered person, but I also believe that my life is mine to live, mine and only mine.

So I have learned the fine art of "Being true to myself"
What does that EVEN MEAN?? Being true to ones self?

As we travel on the ride called life, we often get caught up in being a partner, in being a parent and in being a child, yes... a child. A daughter or a son... An adult child, but a child nonetheless, and as we get caught up in our "titles" we often lose ourselves. In saying that, I will stress, "We do not ever 'find' ourselves, in life we are responsible for creating ourselves". We are responsible for who we become, we are responsible for being true to ourselves, even when we carry our many titles of obligation.

Being true to myself means listening to my "6th sense", it means if something "Doesn't feel right", I'm not going to do it -- It means I don't need to explain myself -- It means that I will not chase anyone and ask them to be part of my life -- It means I will continue to educate myself on matters of the heart, the mind and the body -- It means that I will take care of my physical body -- It means that I will talk kindly to myself -- It means being positive, patient and persistent -- It means that I will not allow another human being to humiliate, talk down to or treat me poorly -- It means that I am enough, I do not ever need to find my identity or self worth from another person. I am enough -- It means I will not apologize for who I am -- It means I will be the best "me" I can be -- It means that no matter how much time it takes, I will follow my dreams. Because you know what? The time is going to pass anyway! I might as well be working towards the things that truly make me happy!

Just because I know how to be true to myself doesn't mean I never feel "down" or even down right depressed. I have recently gone through a break up and it has left me feeling "eh"... I have wanted to roll in sugar and salt and feel sorry for myself. And you know what? That's okay! It's okay to feel sorry for ourselves once in awhile, it's okay to get down, it's okay to eat a whole bag of cookies in 10 minutes... What isn't okay? It's not okay to do that every day! Being the best person I can be doesn't mean I won't have the blah days, it means I take them, put on my fat stretchy pants, put in a chick flick and eat chocolate. Yep... That's exactly what it means. After that... Get back on track. Focus. Focus. Focus.

As our children fly the nest, as we go through the emotions of not being needed by our offspring, and as we decide what to do with the next 40, 50 or 60 years of our lives.
We need to know what brings us the most contentment, what brings us joy. What makes us happy?

What makes me happy?

My top 10 Happy
Being a mother and spending time with my family makes me happy.
Helping other people makes me happy.
Working with children makes me happy.
Travel (Especially to The United Kingdom) makes me happy.
Helping to save the environment makes me happy.
Spending time with friends makes me happy.
Exercise makes me happy.
Finding creative ways to recycle makes me happy.
Blogging and Writing makes me happy.
Capturing life through photography and recording it, makes me happy.

I know who I am, I'm okay with who I am. I'm an imperfect, slightly boisterous, curvy, funny, intelligent woman that is looking forward to many more years of life!

All in all, turning 45 wasn't so bad.
It's going to be a great year!

45... BRING IT! I've so got this!


  1. Well, There you are~ I wondered where you had been. I am glad to see you here. Happy, Happy 45th- I loved my 40's and have loved my 50's, too. You have your head on straight, Tammy. Your top 10 list is wonderful. I am sorry that your relationship ended. That is never easy even when we know it is not in our master plan----it still HURTS! God bless you and your family. I hope you have had a peaceful Memorial Day...and that the stretch pants worked out good today! xo Diana

  2. Happy birthday to you, I like the sound of your happy list. Take care of your self.

  3. Happy Birthday to you Tammy - and here's to many more! Sorry to read of your breakup, I hope that you are OK and wish you all the best with your onwards and upwards plan! Keep going!! xx

  4. HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY my lovely friend... I have an email in the works for you! it's on the top of my to do list.. we have sooooo much to catch up on! Hazel x

  5. Happy birthday again, my beautiful friend! Good to see you writing something over here again - I loved what you had to say, too. Here's to hoping your next 45 years are even better than the last! :)

  6. Happy Birthday Tammy! What a fantastically positive post. You really are an inspiration.
    Ali xx

  7. Happy birthday Tammy. I've missed you and your blog posts. Lovely photo. Wishing you and your family well.

  8. Happy Birthday to you, Tammy!!! You look great, girl, and I hope you have many more wonderful birthdays. :-)

  9. Happy birthday, you're a great age! I enjoyed every age I ever was, except being 30, that one upset until I came to terms with who I am. Sounds like you know yourself well, that's great.

  10. I've been wondering where you were. Happy Birthday! Wise words indeed Tammy x

  11. Happy Birthday! It's nice to hear from you again, and such a positive post too :)

  12. I've missed your posts Tammy! Happy birthday to you, and don't you look great?!

  13. A very happy birthday Tammy! Here here! I'm a year older than you and I agree with everything you have written here. I make the younger members of my family and work colleagues laugh when I shout out 'I'm 46 years old - I have EVERY right to be grumpy and not agree with you'. So, basically... still not being taken seriously! :-D Have a wonderful cake filled day my friend!! xx


  14. Happy birthday Tammy, I just turned 45 too!! You sound very positive, I'm sorry you had a break up. It sounds like you will be able to stand up and dust yourself down okay. Look forward to hearing more, Heather x

  15. Birthday greetings Tammy and Many Happy Returns. Hope you celebrated in style. Sorry about your recent break up. Nice to see you back here, we've missed you.
    Patricia x

  16. What a wonderful, uplifting and happy post -- and an exciting day! Happiest of birthdays, Tammy. It certainly sounds to me like your head is screwed on very nicely! I know it's the start of what I hope will be a spectacular year!

  17. Happy birthday Tammy! My daughter and I both share May birthdays too.
    Lovely to discover your blog and to read the 10 things that make you happy.
    Enjoy your week

  18. Happy birthday! Here's to another 50+!

  19. Happy Birthday Tammy my lovely blogger friend xx

  20. Happy Birthday, it sounds like you are very happy indeed!

  21. Belated HAPPY BIRTHDAY ... you're looking good on it!! Your philosophy on life is inspiring. Hope you had a wonderful day. M x

  22. Hi Tammy! Happy birthday. I had to laugh at the music in the supermarket graphic. About a year ago I was shopping in Trader Joe's and they were playing a Third Eye Blind song and I was singing along as I shopped, thinking about how cool it was that they'd play "my" music there. :)

  23. Happy belated birthday. Welcome to the 45 club, I've only got just over three months left of being a member of it. I left an answer to your question over on my blog underneath your comment, hope it helps.

  24. I'm right behind you and like you, I'm planning on 50 more years also.

  25. Many (slightly belated) happy returns!

  26. HI Tammy, this is a very belated happy birthday wish! I am so behind with my blog reading, so many things happening family wise at the moment. I loved reading this post. I have to say though that I think I am enjoying my 50's more than I did my 40's although the years are going far too quickly for my liking!

  27. Tammy, I can't believe I never commented here before because I definitely remember reading your post! I have to agree - getting older is definitely more fun and I don't miss my 20s and 30s. Sorry to hear about your break up Tammy. As they say, onwards and upwards!

  28. Wiser with every year is how I see birthdays, and more excuses to have fun!

  29. Happy very belated birthday! My birthday is just one day after yours:) And I refuse to think of myself as "middle age", even though that's what most people might call me. It is all in the attitude, right?!


Thank you for your positive comments!